Muscle Memory: Trauma, Neurodivergence & The Female Nervous System

An Experimental Documentary Feature

Working to reach our first production milestone: travel to Austin, TX to film with somatic embodiment expert Marie Belle Perez Rivera, PhD.

Project Stage: Early production

Logline: A filmmaker discovers her own neurodivergence while making a documentary about women confronting trauma through their athletic pursuits, transforming artist into subject.

Brief Description: When Afghan cyclist Rukhsar Habibzai lands in Washington, D.C., the war she thought she left behind deplanes with her. PTSD is subsonic. It physically shakes and upends the body. A stationary body and mind cannot heal. She must keep pedaling. Because healing is not a destination or finish line. Healing is a way of living. The Filmmaker, inspired by Rukhsar and on a parallel embodiment journey as part of processing her own trauma, seeks other women in various stages of healing through movement. Her quest takes a detour at the film’s onset when she is diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) alongside PTSD and becomes part of the film, forcing her on an experiential breadcrumb journey to consult a range of “embodied experts.”

The result? Something entirely unexpected.

Context and Relevance: MUSCLE MEMORY is concerned with neurodivergence (such as ASD/Autism Spectrum), PTSD (acquired neurodivergence), and other co-occurring mental health conditions in women, the diagnostic criteria of such we are only just beginning to understand, and how somatic practices can heal and aid in the processing of such conditions. We also believe somatic embodiment and movement therapies have broad-reaching implications for everyone to promote healing from trauma, stress, and other psycho-emotional difficulties that pop up as a byproduct of simply being human. The film explores the philosophy of nondualism — the idea that the brain is an integral part of the body, influencing emotions and psychological states — and the necessity of a community-oriented approach to healing and neurological processing.

Critical to the film’s foundation is the idea that dissociation of the female body and mind–through PTSD, ASD, or other forms of violence and/or neurodevelopmental disordering–is a type of trauma in and of itself that physical movement alleviates. The film interweaves multiple themes of recovery as it documents the stories of women navigating various forms of neurodivergence and mental health conditions. Enter: Somatic psychology. Embodied cognition. Trauma integration. Nondualist philosophy. The convergence of these disciplines becomes coherent through the lived experiences of the participants in the film, the filmmaking process itself, and consultations with experts in the fields of sports medicine, neuroscience, philosophy, anthropology, and psychology.

These stories of resilience and expert insights ask big questions: Is it possible to reunite body and mind? What does science say about the benefits of movement for mental health challenges and neurodevelopmental disorders? What do neuro-supportive physical practices look like? How can we transcend societal expectations and embody our beautiful humanity? How does one overcome?